Geek Habitat

A fun thread about what moms have learned since the birth of their child(ren).

Highlights:

• Things you never thought you’d say get said almost daily (”Stop licking the floor,” being one!)
• Pepper in root beer does not taste good. (Remind me to thank him for that again.)
• Do NOT give army men to you children and then fall asleep. The little guns hurt when shoved up your nose!!!
• Any word not to be said by a 2 yr. old can be heard when the child is upstairs & you are downstairs. (I swear she has super sonic ears) and it will be repeated.
• Playdough usually has a lifespan of about 3 days becaus it gets left out in places you never thought to look.
• Phrases you use WILL come back to haunt you. “Mommy, I do not think you are understanding me, you NEED to . . . .”
• Peanut butter really does get gum out of hair!
• Pacifiers are flushable. Toilet roll holders are not.
• Dermabond (glue) is worthless–go straight to stitches.
• When you have 3 kids that are a year and a half apart you end up with three different crayon lines about a foot apart on every wall of the house.
• A toddler is the only known creature in the universe that can run at the speed of light.
• Everyone who has ever said “that tastes like sh*t” is probably actually speaking from experience.
• I’ve learned that when the house is suddenly filled with a hushed silence, run like crazy because they are doing SOMETHING they shouldn’t be.
• M&Ms might not melt in your hands, but they do melt in a diaper.
• When all else fails, sprinkle snacks on the floor. Any kid will eat every bite, even if it is healthy.
• Where ever you go, at least 10 people in the store will know your kids name by the time you leave.
• Every newborn is funny looking, including your own, although you never notice until you pull out the pictures a few years later.
• Once children learn how to take off their clothes, there is no telling where or when they will be naked.
• It’s scary how quiet Wal-mart gets when a toddler has just screamed at the top of their lungs.